Thursday, March 10, 2011

Birthdays.

My birthday is one week from yesterday.
And the baby? One year old in one week.
I promised myself I would be healthier by now.
I promised myself I would be lighter by now.
And while I can run faster, and longer, and lift more, I still keep wondering if I've really changed.
Because I can't wait until the birthday party so that I can have a cupcake.
And I still crave diet coke on a hourly daily basis.
And I would love to make my family some of this for dinner tonight.
So am I really healthier?
Yes, I have lost almost 30 pounds. (like, really, almost.)
And I can fit in to smaller clothes.
And I am more fit in general than I was when I started this journey.
But all of those cravings, and wants?
Those haven't changed.
I promised myself to be a better version of me by this time next week.
And I'm just not sure if I've accomplished that or not.

4 comments:

FatAngryBlog said...

Baby girl will be 1 in 14 days (though I have to have her party on the 19th)... I am already trying to plan who to give any leftover cake to!

Weightless said...

When I first started, I set a date and a timeline for myself and my goals. I didn't make my weight goal but like you, I did make huge strides. I learned though, that even though I didn't make goal, I was living life better and feel like a better version of myself. Even though, I still have many of the same bad habits, cravings, etc but the was you respond to those is different. The way you live life day by day is different and a better way of life for yourself, your husband, family and a especially a for your daughter.

I've learned that this journey is full of valley's and peaks, just like life. I keep working towards my goal, even though I may slip and stumble. I'm living better day by day by the grace of
God. I will (and you will) reach goal in his time.

Happy Birthday :)

Adrienne said...

You sure have changed. You are 30 pounds lighter and you stick to your work outs. Just because you still crave a cupcake doesn't mean you haven't changed girl!! You have. You're awesome. I commented on your hubbys blog. :)

SeattleRunnerGirl said...

I think if you are waiting for a day when you will never crave cake or baked ziti, you will be waiting a long time. Being healthy isn't about your thoughts/cravings - it's about your CHOICES. And the choices you've made? Have allowed you to lose 30 pounds. And be a runner. And eat healthy stuff more often than not.

Don't strive for perfection - it's not achievable. Instead, celebrate the MAJOR progress you've made!

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